A list of redeeming features

Well I'm pretty much coming up with nothing to be honest. They're covered in revolting spines so they aren't worth eating for a kick off. I've basically never met a hedgehog who I didn't think was a complete cunt. 
I used to know a hedgehog called Robert Cluster. On one occasion he invited me over to his place for dinner and, as I recall, he spent the entire evening defending the actions of that bozo Ian Huntley. I finished my blancmange, made my excuses and left. You'll certainly do very well to find a bigger tosser than Robert Cluster..