DOGFISH NOW ELIGIBLE FOR CRUFTS

Kennel Club to allow tiny sharks to be displayed at prestigious dog show

The UK Kennel Club - whose job it is to oversee various canine activities- have today BOW-WOWED to ‘PIER PRESSURE from dogfish owners and stated that they will now be allowed to display their pets at next year’s Crufts show at the National Exhibition Centre. The sub aquatic creatures had been on a long list - along with American Pitbulls and Pyrenean Mastiffs - as not being recognised by the estemmed Kennel Club (which was founded in 1873) but following a lengthy campaign, they’ll now be strutting their stuff along with the best of them at the world famous dog show in 2023.

Spokesman for the organistion, Duncan Jowells said “we’re thrilled to finally recognise these creatures from the order squalidae, but its not going to be without its complaications”. “At the moment we haven’t decided what category dogfish will elligible for, but I suspect it will either be in the toy or pastoral” he continued.

However, some dog trainers aren’t happy with the decission. Dog breeder, Hetty Balbatross, whose Shetland Sheepdog competed in last year’s agility competition said “I think it’s a riculous decission. They’re already talking about flooding the entire venue with 2 million gallons of water, which is fine for the dogfish, but it’s going to make that bit where the lesbians dance with their dogs nye on impossible without lots of expensive scuba gear”. “If they want to the display their dogfish then they should drag them around in a little tank otherise it’s simply not fair on all the dogs which don’t have gills” she said.
Mr Jowell’s responded to the backlash by saying “we undertand that it’s going to be a bit of an upheaval, but it would be unfair on the 4 people that we know of in UK who keep dogfish as pets to deny them the opportunity to join in on the greatest show on Earth”.